Saturday, April 07, 2012

{about me and about blogging and then about me again}

i keep getting tagged in these 11 question surveys, and i secretly want to do them--because of myspace, you know. but i never actually do them because as much as this is my blog and, therefore, a blog about me... i don't want it to be a me-garden where i grow my imaginary celebrity complexes and assume that everybody out there cares what room in my house is my favourite and where i shop for groceries and stuff. because, let's be honest, you don't. you just don't. and i'm so ok with that.

that's the funny thing about blogs. i think that the first time someone you don't know comments on your blog, it plants a seed {if i may continue with the me-garden metaphor? i may? thank you} in your subconscious which, with the cultivation of a few well-meaning strangers, very quickly grows into this weird forest that you can't see out of, a mess of vines and trees and shrubbery which blocks out even the sunniest sun {in this quickly-becoming-awkward metaphor, the sun is the rational realization that you're not famous, that your self-worth is not based on how many people comment on/subscribe to your online journal, and that the tabloids are absolutely not anxiously waiting behind the tree in your front yard to peek into your window and find out what, exactly, it is that you eat for brekkie}.

{{on a side note: i feel like that's why everyone's having online identity crises and freaking out when they don't know what to write for a few days and mourning over lost followers and quiet readers. because we start out as nothing, and then we think we're something, and then we realize we're not as something as we thought we were, and then all we care about is not being nothing again. it's not so much what we're doing or not doing as the motivation behind it, the motivation being to be known and liked. i don't even know if i'm still talking about blogging or just life in general. i digress.}}

i had a moment like that a bit ago. and then i peeked out from behind a bush and remembered that i actually like blogging, that blogging is for fun. i like interacting, but i don't want to put myself on a pedestal and imagine that the blogosphere revolves around me--and by that same virtue, the blogosphere will not fall apart if i don't write for a couple days {or even ever again}, or if i write a really silly post {like this one, or the one about the nuns}, or if i'm just myself and don't put forth a special effort to be liked by everyone.

so, anyway, the point is not even close to all that. the point is actually that i'm going to finally do one of these surveys. but it's not because i think you care what my favourite things are or that you're going to find it astonishingly interesting, but because i just feel like it. and when you're blogging for fun, that's how you decide what to blog about.

i was tagged by alivia from brunch in april. {thanks, everyone else who tagged me, also. i love being tagged. i do. it's like being picked first in gym class, which has never actually happened to me.}

1. What is your favorite part of the day?
i like the beginning and the end of a day. the middle part is ok too, but i sort of believe that all the best things happen at either the beginning or the end. brekkie. supper. sleep. sunrises. sunsets. quiet conversations--cbc radio even plays all their best music in the morning and evenings. 
so. there's THAT. 

2. Do you have a guilty pleasure band or artist?
{here's the thing: people always are like, "oh, this is my guilty pleasure...!" right out loud for everyone to hear. but if it was really your guilty pleasure, if you really felt guilty about it, you wouldn't tell a soul. hence, yes. but of course i'm not telling who it [they] is [are].}

3. What is your favorite thing about where you live?
it's small enough and big enough and sometimes there is a good band or two playing just down the street. 

4 for real: What is your biggest pet peeve?
em, one pet peeve i was thinking of just this morning was product placement in movies. 

5. Do you have a favorite celebrity? A least favorite?
jian ghomeshi and martin short and robert downey jr. and ryan & molly guildemond. 
least favourite is maybe snooki. and i didn't even know who she was until thursday. i know. i'm like a home-schooled kid on a deserted island. 

6.  If you could travel to any place from a story, book, movie, etc. where would you go and why?
new york.

7. What are 5 things you like about yourself?
i'll be up front with you: i like the colour of my hair {banana}. i think i have good taste in food. this question is making me uncomfortable, so i guess i'm modest, and i like that. 
three is enough.

8. If you could acquire one skill instantly, which would it be?
to sing like molly guildemond. she has the weirdest voice and i love it.

9. What song would you choose if you could only listen to one song for the rest of your life?
yeah right. 

10. When do you feel most safe?
i pretty much never feel safe. i watched too much tv as a teenager. there is just so much that could happen to a person in a lifetime. 

11. How would describe yourself in only five words?
i have blue eyes and
i guess i can't. rats.


Alivia said...

Gosh I love this so much.

Caitlin said...

Gahhh you always word things so well, Suzy. This is exactly what I've been feeling with blogging lately and I loved reading your thoughts on it.

I've been trying to do more of a "do what makes me happy" approach to blogging lately. Like if I wonder "should I post this? It's the weekend and no one reads it!" and then I'm like you know what, fuck it. And I post it and it doesn't get many views, and the world doesn't end.

Have a good Easter weekend pretty lady.

Anonymous said...

I can't even tell you how happy this post made me...yeah you're right. I can stop blogging for months if that's what I feel like doing and the world won't fall apart. We'll see. Who cares if I get comments or followers. Really. Whatever.

MySpecialAgent said...

I snorted at "home-schooled kid on a desert island".

Sarah Rooftops said...

So, I joined Instagram a few days ago (well, you know that) and I'm finding it so weird how much people let their guard down on there - all these big name bloggers swearing and making weird little jokes about toilets while their blogs are so carefully pretty and pastel. I don't know what my point is here, except that it popped in my mind while I was reading this - maybe just that it's odd to acknowledge how much lots of bloggers hide behind our online personas.

Also, your answers made me laugh.

Suzy Marie said...

Suzyyyy, I love this post! I have become a bit stuck in that forest at the moment and thinking "my views are declining what can i doooooo?!?!" and being all sad about it. I have to remind myself to step back and think, you are doing this for yourself, what does it matter if only a few people read it. I'm glad I'm not the only one who gets this weird self-conscious blog thing.

Meg said...

There is a terrifying new American television show that I'm not even going to tell you about because it's so scary I fell off the couch while watching an ad for it - so sending you out there to google it just seems mean. but, yea, i totally get #10!

larisaa said...

I love this rambly ramble post. I get your metaphor. I get it. I can't believe you didn't know who snooki was! I love jersey shore. It's my [guilty] pleasure. Hahaha. Ha.

Suzy Krause said...

well garsh, thanks! ;)

Suzy Krause said...

for sure--i can't remember if i ever actually did comment on your post about this the other day. i feel like everyone was ok with who they were and how their blogs were until these blogging superstars started popping up and then everyone wanted to be famous. we can't all be famous. and we don't all want to be famous. so.

but thanks. :) you're fantastic.

Suzy Krause said...

exaaactly. BUT. don't stop blogging for months. i would miss you.

Suzy Krause said...

haha i hope i didn't offend anyone with that. {i have home-schooled friends who i love.} i just feel very silly to not have known who snooki was. apparently everyone does!

Suzy Krause said...

haha it is weird hey? i say, "BE THE SAME PERSON ALL THE TIME."
i think it would be too much work to have 5 personalities.

Suzy Krause said...

oh man, i feel like everyone lately is having the weird self-concious blog thing. but it's funny: i have my bloggers who i will read day in and out, even if they have a post or two i don't relate to or don't love. it's about letting your personality show through and just having fun with it. that's what sticks with people in the end, i think? :)

Suzy Krause said...

hahahaha THANK YOU for not telling me what it is. i would have googled it and never slept again.

Suzy Krause said...

i know! i always heard people talking about her, but just stumbled across her the other night. i watched her vlogs on youtube and almost died laughing alone in my house {at not with}. she's RIDICULOUS.

Jen Glen said...

At least you're not alone on the desert island (as opposed to the deserted island) b/c I have NOOOO idea who Snooki is - none, whatsoever. Can I be home-schooled too?

Caitlin said...

Yeah. And "Blog Famous" is faint praise, indeed. YOU are fantastic-er.

Suzy Krause said...

you cannot be home-schooled because you've already been public schooled. sir william though? you could home-school him?

also: your life is probably peachier for not knowing who snooki is.

Suzy Marie said...

Yes I totally agree. Like your blog :)

Suzy Krause said...

oh garsh. :)

Sarah Rooftops said...

Exactly. My only filter is, "Would I be mortified if my dad saw this?" Beyond that, just be yourself!

Suzy Krause said...

hahaha good filter.

Emily said...

I started blogging on a regular basis maybe six months ago, and I've struggled to not only find an audience, but to find what kind of blogging fits me. I do a little bit of everything right now, but I haven't gotten into a groove yet. Honestly, I have fun blogging, and I amuse myself, so if no one else reads, so what? Sure, it'd be nice to have followers, but I get more out of it than what others can give me.

Suzy Krause said...

i'm the same way--i don't have a groove to fit into in the blogging world. and i've stopped trying to find it! haha, any time you put the value of your blog into the readers' hands, you'll be disappointed, i think. even if you have a million followers.

Emily said...

Yes, exactly! I think by being my truest self and not trying too hard, I will get readers who are genuinely interested in what I have to say and who will get something out of it. I would much rather have a small following of people who appreciate me than a huge following that just wants to look at my pretty pictures.