The ABCs of 2021

Let's all say it together and get it over with:

That was not how I expected 2021 to go.

I don't know what I did expect. More live music and in-person events? Maybe...I dunno...a trip? On an airplane? Maybe just a simple, straightforward, gradual decline of COVID cases? More parties. Less missed school. 

Wishful thinking, all of it. And I'm usually SO GOOD at being pessimistic! I've learned a valuable lesson here: pessimism is great, and will protect you from the disappointment of going into a year like, "LIVE MUSIC IS BACK" when live music is, in fact, not super back. 

Oh well. Here's what 2021 actually looked like:

A - A lot of evenings at home with Barclay. Which I really, really enjoyed. HOWEVER, I have realized that maybe I'm enjoying them a bit toooo much and am losing the desire to leave my house after 7 pm (or ever)? Which, yikes, 24-year-old me would be ANGRY with 34-year-old me for what I've become (even if she understood that it began out of a heart to contribute to the greater good and continued out of a heart of I really like my husband and just want to hang out with him all the time). If you are my real life friend, can you kick me in the butt on this a little [when omicron is less omnipresent]? I don't even know who wants to hang out with me anymore but if you do, let me know. Drag me out of my cozy blue robe and away from my books, puzzles, video games, and Netflix, even if you're just dragging me to YOUR books, puzzles, vids, and Netflix. Hey! Maybe I can wear my cozy blue robe at YOUR house! Depending on how close we are. 

B - Baked less bread than usual. Just not a year for bread baking, I guess. Bought a lot of those croissants that you have to throw in the oven for five minutes and pretended I baked them from scratch. It was a year for that.

C - Changed my mind on a number of things.

D - Deck hangs. This was our first year with a functional deck in our back yard. We bought real patio furniture and we LIVED out there. We ate out there, laid out there when we were sick, sat out there with friends and family, drew pictures and played games out there... It was so great. I'm a very outdoorsy person now.

E - Estonia! Sorry I Missed You was published in Estonia in October (my very first translation and massively exciting for me. I even got an email from a reader who told me she'd found my book in an Estonian library and I had one of those rare, fleeting moments of feeling like a real author) (I think most authors will tell you this: none of us feel like real authors and most of us are chasing that feeling constantly and when it shows up we're always very surprised about it). 

F - Firsts. 2021 had a few 'pandemic firsts' for me. I don't think anyone reading this who knows me IRL will be super shocked by this, but I am definitely in the more cautious camp as far as pandemic living—no indoor dining, no plane trips or major road trips. Haven't slept in a hotel or enjoyed live music indoors since before Covid hit. No judgement on anyone who's done those things, it's just what we decided early on and it's not been a huge deal for us to keep on keeping on. If anything, I've just been excited to enjoy those things again when it doesn't feel at all iffy for me personally—and anyway, what is life without creatively entertaining yourself and your kids while also giving everyone something to look forward to and a renewed appreciation for the small stuff, right? Still, 2021 held a few golden baby steps back into normalcy (between major waves in our city)—my first time eating [outside] at a restaurant with my friend Becky, the kids' first time back at their favorite museum down the street, my first haircut, my first and only indoor coffee date with Karlie, our first time back at the Science Centre down the street...and my first cold since March of 2020. 

G - Grade Two, for Sully! 

H - Had a very nice time getting to know my neighbors better. There are so many good people living on my block and I honestly don't think I would've really gotten to know most of them very well if it hadn't been for Covid. My kids love all their kids and they're all around the same age and it's one of those things that just feels so lucky.

I - I decreed every Wednesday and Saturday Noodle Night in my house. It alleviated the pressure of having to think of a thing to make on those nights that everyone would eat, and since I do most of the cooking around here I figured it was okay if I had my favorite meal twice a week. Right? Or am I just a selfish mom?

J - Joined Barclay's snow clearing crew—and quite loved it. (Except the one week where the snowblowers broke and it blizzarded. I had an actual moment of honestly believing I was having a very vivid nightmare. It was -50ish and it was blowing and snowing as we were shoveling and the homeowner opened his door and visibly recoiled when he saw me and the literal icicles hanging from my eyelashes. I pulled my mask down (worn for warmth, not covid reasons) and my eyelashes stuck to it and some of them ripped out. "S...s...stay...warm..." he croaked and, if I'm being honest, the fact that someone felt so sorry for me made me feel a little bit better.)

K - Kindergarten, for Scarlett!

L - Live music: Marissa Burwell (at the RFF outdoor stage in the Conexus parking lot), some 70s cover band on a beach stage at Moose Mountain, and MxPx (online). This is the shortest list of live shows I have had literally ever (I am prettttty sure I saw more shows than this as a one year old baby). Just the other day someone was telling me that there would be live music at the book thing I was planning on attending and they said, "It's just a guy with a guitar." I said to them, "I would sit and listen to a guy with a FLUTE right now. I am desperate." 2022 better deliver to me MORE LIVE MUSIC. Pleaseohpleaseohplease.

M - Made some progress on Books 3, 4, and 5, but finished none of them. Feeling hopeful that 2022 will be the year I finish ALL THREE (and if I can sell even one of the three to a publisher, I'll be thrilled).

N - Number of books read: 18. A mix of audiobooks, ARCs and "regular" books. I went through long stretches of time this year where I couldn't read (or write) because life felt stranger than fiction and fiction couldn't hold my attention. It was frustrating. But ohhhh well. 

O - Ordered in a lot more than past years—Vic's, Cathedral Social Hall, & Fat Badger were probably our top three places.

P - Planted more things this year than all the other years of my life combined. Hostas and dazzleberries and sweet peas and dogwoods and carrots and hot peppers and tomatoes (those died) and strawberries and rhubarb and basil and hollyhocks and a cranberry bush and chives and assorted lettuces and even a couple of apple trees. Other things too! Barclay kept bringing home extra plants from landscaping jobs and, for a while there, every time I had Feelings of any kind (I am a lady of many Feelings) I went out and planted something from the extra plants pile. He'd come home from work and be like, "Ah, I see you've been having Feelings today." And I'd be like, "Yes, and in four years my Feelings will produce actual apples."

Q - Quite a lot of work accomplished on the basement. It's not done, but it's looking spiffy. Barclay is, in fact, down there right now hanging ceilings. I can feel things getting done beneath my feet. 

R - Russia! Sorry I Missed You came out in Russia in December. (This link here will take you to the publisher's website where there's a write-up on the book and a recipe for sweet little Ghost cookies! Awww.)

S - Said goodbye to Grandpa Glen in the fall. 

T - Twelfth wedding anniversary. A dozen years! That's bizarre. 

U - Updated my website once, a tiny bit. Completely forgot to send a single newsletter. (I'm not great at these things.)

V - Vaxxes; we gots our shots. 

W - Worked out four times per week, every single week, for the entire year. This is the first year in my entire life I have been able to say that.

X - XXXIV (I turned 34 this year. It's weird, because I remember 28 feeling 'old.' 29 felt 'young.' 30 felt UTTERLY TERRIFYING. 31, 32, 33, and 34 have all felt 'young' again. I'm dreading 35, but Barclay is 36 and that seems okay. Does anyone else feel this way about specific ages? Or do you all think in decades, or what?)

Y - Yay! The kids learned to ride their bikes this summer and we spent so much time at the BMX track and the Conexus parking lot and the neighbors' back alley with their kids.

Z - Zoom, again. Less Zoom than last year, but still. I did a presentation through the library over Zoom, helped a friend launch her book over Zoom, chatted with some book clubs over Zoom, and hung out with my family over Zoom. 

And now, here we are in 2022. I'm going to be intentionally pessimistic, so as not to repeat the mistakes of last New Year's Day, and I'm recording it here: 

This year will probably suck. I'm expecting an asteroid or an alien invasion. 

(Okay, I'll allow for a glimmer of optimism, for those of you who need that sort of thing: maybe the aliens will play some live music for us.)