A Quiet Month

I'm sitting in a quiet kitchen, listening to the sound of the dishwasher and fifty birds yelling at each other outside my window. I've turned all of the lights off and opened only the blinds on the south side of the house. I'm thinking about making a latte, but dreading the sound of the coffee grinder.

I am...overstimulated?

May was a lot—which is funny, because I had been telling people it was going to be a quiet month. Releasing a book comes with a lot of social things, mostly concentrated in the month of the actual launch and then tapering off as people forget you exist and move onto the shinier, newer releases (such a relief, such a blessing, but it hurts your feelings every time anyway). ITWBHB had two launch months, because it had two different pub days, so it took up the entire fall and most of the winter. There was a trickle of events after Christmas, but one day in March I looked at the calendar and realized that there was only one thing left: my friend Adelle's launch party in April. She would fly in from Ontario, we'd do a little in-conversation thing at Everyday Kitchen, and I would be officially off the hook. There was nothing left on the calendar, not professionally, not personally. May was for working on my next book, taking naps and recharging my social battery which I worried, at that point, was permanently dead. 

But then.

Okay, what was the first thing? Right. I found out, happily, that ITWBHB was shortlisted for some Saskatchewan Book Awards. There would be a gala in Saskatoon on May 9 where they'd announce the winners. Okay! That sounded fun, and I hadn't been to a gala since 2013. I was going to need to buy a fancy dress. Barclay would need a suit. This was so out of the ordinary for us; we're not fancy people. So I put that on the calendar, and it was The Only Thing in May. One big, fancy thing. Sweet. We asked my parents to take the kids for the whole weekend—after all, we didn't have anything else going on that month, and it had been a solid half a year since we had a night away from the kids. Might as well make it a little vacation, right?  

Oh, but then my mom texted to let me know that we were having a family reunion in Medicine Hat. When? May 17-19. Okay. Doable. The very next week. 

Oh, but then Barclay came home from work and said, "Hey, we've been invited to a gala!" And I said, "I know! It's on the calendar!" And he said, "No, a different gala. This one is on May third!" And I said, "Well, at least that's not on the same day as the other gala, or the family reunion!" And he said, "True!" And I said, "And we can get double the use out of our gala clothes!" And he said, "Awesome!"

Oh, but then Barclay texted me a few days later and said, "Haha, so what do you think about going to another gala?" It was a charity gala for Bring 'Em Up and the Open Door Society, and he was thinking about buying a table. I said, "Hey, we've got the gala clothes, we might as well." I put that one on the calendar too. May 23. 

Oh, but then my friend Ashley invited me to her wedding vow renewal on May 24! Which was very cool; I had never been to one of those before. And if I curled my hair on the 23, I wouldn't have to do it again for the renewal. Perfect. I put it on the calendar. 

Oh! But then I got another very nice email, telling me that I was a runner-up for the City of Regina Writing Award, for my next [as yet unfinished] novel, You Won't Believe Your Eyes. There would be an awards ceremony at the Hotel Sask on May 29! PUT IT ON THE CALENDAR. 

Okay, and there were more things but you're like, Suzy, we don't need a play by play. We all have calendars, and they are all very full. Yes, yes, I get it. I'm sorry. I'm not trying to imply that my calendar is more overwhelming than yours, I'm just saying that this month was supposed to be empty, like a Saskatchewan wheat field on a clear, cloudless summer day, but somehow it ended up being more like a bustling Toronto street with bikes and cars and pedestrians and a the-end-is-near guy. Because by the time May finally arrived, the calendar also contained a book reading, and a friend's book fair, and a second family reunion, and Sully's first public musical performance with his band (which ended up feeling like the most important thing of the whole month). 

I bought the dress, Barclay bought the suit. I wore the dress three times, and Barclay got five wears out of the suit. I did two readings, one from each book. I gave two acceptance speeches, got a plaque and a certificate and a nice little cheque. I caught up with maybe (actually) a hundred relatives and made a bunch of new friends. We spent a total of 22 hours in the car. I signed books, and bought books (namely I Hate Parties by Jes Battis, A Simple Carpenter by Dave Margoshes, and Everything Is Fine Here by Iryn Tushabe). 

Sadly, near the end of the month, I also said goodbye to a very dear old friend. Because even when life is very busy and moving along at an amazing pace, it stops, too. Even when life is very vibrant and beautiful and exciting, it is sad, too.

So.

This morning, my kids went off to school, Barclay went to the office, and here I am, thinking about maybe making coffee. Thankful for the quiet. Processing. 

And I know better than to say that June will be a quiet month.